Core Beliefs
Last week, I explored the cross-cultural impact of empathy. This week, I had the opportunity to engage with leaders from various fields, and our discussions centered on the influence of core beliefs—particularly those that involve compliance, compulsiveness, and control. A friend of mine, a Doctor of Counseling, shared an insightful perspective: due to the fallen nature of humanity, one of these beliefs typically emerges during childhood, shaping decision-making, even though these beliefs can often lack a valid foundation.
Core beliefs like compliance, compulsiveness, and control can profoundly affect how people approach decisions, evaluate options, and handle uncertainty. As leaders, it’s crucial to recognize the influence of these beliefs in both ourselves and others, even when they don’t meet clinical criteria for dysfunction, such as OCD. Understanding these dynamics provides valuable insights into decision-making processes.
Compliance (People-Pleasing)
People with a compliant core belief may:
Struggle to make independent decisions, often deferring to others’ opinions or preferences.
Have difficulty saying “no” or setting boundaries, which can lead to choices misaligned with their needs or values.
Experience excessive anxiety about disappointing others, clouding their judgment.
Compulsiveness (Perfectionism)
Individuals with compulsive tendencies often:
Engage in overplanning and rumination, resulting in "analysis paralysis."
Struggle to tolerate uncertainty, leading them to avoid decisions with ambiguous outcomes.
Display perfectionism that hinders timely and effective decision-making.
Control and Decision-Making
Those with a strong need for control may:
Have difficulty delegating or sharing decision-making responsibilities.
Experience heightened anxiety in situations outside their control, resulting in overly cautious or risk-averse choices.
Resist adapting to changing circumstances, clinging to decisions even when they’re no longer optimal.
A presentation and training by Dr. Jeff Cox lead to the intersection of core beliefs and leadership.
As leaders, understanding these belief patterns within ourselves and our teams enables us to foster more intentional communication and develop strategies that present decisions in a clearer, more helpful context. For example, I work with an incredible leader who identifies as a "people-pleaser." With nearly two decades of high-level athletic training, she’s developed behaviors often associated with a “9” or "Peacemaker" on the Enneagram. While I don’t endorse any one personality assessment, this label serves as a clue about her compliant tendencies. Recognizing this, I gently remind her that it’s not her responsibility to ensure everyone else’s happiness—a shift in perspective that helps her make more balanced decisions.
Leaders, do you notice one of these core beliefs influencing your own decision-making? Can you identify them within your team, and can you guide your leadership to reframe these beliefs in ways that promote healthier, more effective decision-making? Understanding and challenging unhelpful thought patterns is a key to developing well-rounded leadership. Practicing mindfulness and taking a more objective stance towards our thoughts can help reduce their influence on the choices we make.