Growing Up..not OLD
In March 2019, I believe my leadership journey truly began to gain momentum. By then, I had completed 36 classes on coaching and 12 on public speaking. That spring, I attended John Maxwell’s International Certification in Florida—a transformative experience surrounded by phenomenal leaders and world-class teaching. I returned home energized, carrying a powerful belief: everyone has the potential to lead. While I still hold to that belief, I’ve since tempered it with the awareness that I had been viewing leadership through “rose-colored glasses,” inspired by the sheer excitement of the event.
I see leadership as a calling imbued with gifts from God. However, I also firmly believe that anyone can learn and grow in leadership. Over time, I’ve come to realize the critical importance of cultivating personal maturity before developing leadership influence. Maturity lays a foundation that amplifies leadership growth.
Later that same year, I met someone who would challenge and inspire me deeply. This man lived and worked in Western China, creating a network of guesthouses among Tibetan communities in the mountains. He was also passionate about helping others, like me, appreciate and love the people and culture of the region. Eager to learn, I planned my first trip to China, with friends connecting me to the perfect travel partner.
Enter Woody—an 83-year-old, highly decorated Marine, fluent in Mandarin, and embarking on his 80th trip to China. After his service in Vietnam, Woody transitioned into education, dedicating much of his life to cultural exchange and English language camps across China. A living legend of a life well-lived, Woody was someone I deeply admired, and I was thrilled to travel alongside him.
At the airport, I seized the moment and asked Woody a big question: What has God been teaching you lately? His face lit up as he shared that he and his mentor were focused on the concept of being over doing. He explained that much of his life had been spent preoccupied with accomplishments, but he had recently realized the need to prioritize who he was becoming over what he was achieving.
Two things struck me. First, this 83-year-old legend had a mentor. Second, Woody was still passionate about growth. His mentor, an 85-year-old no-nonsense guide, held him accountable for his learning and his character development. That conversation, and the journey that followed, profoundly impacted my understanding of maturity and its role in leadership.
Woody and I in far Western China
Four Marks of Maturity
Reflecting on Woody’s life and my studies of the Apostle Paul’s writings, I’ve identified four key markers of maturity—rooted in faith yet broadly applicable to leadership:
Walk in Love
Love is foundational. Without love and care for others, even the smartest leader lacks maturity. A friend recently shared a story about taking his daughters on a bike ride through a city Christmas light display. Despite the beauty around them, they complained the entire time—an example of immaturity’s self-centeredness. Love, in contrast, shifts our focus outward. Mature leaders demonstrate genuine care for their teams and those they serve.
2. Deepening Wisdom and Knowledge of God
Maturity brings wisdom, often defined as “skill at living.” It’s about improving in areas like relationships, responsibilities, and decision-making. Scripture teaches that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom (Proverbs 9:10). Leaders who lack wisdom often struggle with life’s complexities, while those who pursue it grow in both faith and effectiveness.
3. Departing from Sin
None of us are perfect, but maturity involves actively moving away from behaviors and choices that harm our relationships with God and others. Leaders who aren’t intentional about addressing their shortcomings are stunted in their growth.
4. Perseverance and Consistency
Maturity means staying steadfast in the face of challenges. People who abandon commitments when difficulties arise often demonstrate low maturity. True leaders remain resilient and dependable, regardless of obstacles.
Woody: A Model of Maturity
On our trip, Woody exemplified these four marks. His love for people was evident in every interaction. He shared his practices, like silence and solitude, to grow closer to God and improve his life. His focus on being holy (1 Peter 1:16) showed a commitment to leaving self-centeredness behind for God’s work. And his perseverance? Incredible. Despite battling stomach sickness, Woody embraced the challenges of his 80th trip with enthusiasm. On one hike, I reminded our host of Woody’s age, to which he replied, “I know... He’s the one who said he wanted to do this!”
Woody … maturity in an amazingly awesome person.
Maturity in the Business World
Though these marks are rooted in faith, they’re also valuable in professional settings. They can be summarized as:
Kindness
Growth and Improvement
Perseverance and Consistency
How Leaders Can Foster Maturity
As leaders, we play a crucial role in helping others grow in maturity. Here’s how:
Help people recognize their potential for growth.
Let them set their own development paths.
Provide external energy through coaching and support.
If we want the best for our teams, we must focus not just on improving their work or tasks but on fostering their overall maturity.
How would you describe your own maturity using these markers?
What about your team? What are you doing to help them grow?